Fear of Failure or success ?

When we fear failure it holds us back in many ways and for many reasons.

We might be a perfectionist and because things will NEVER be perfect which means we will automatically fail with our own expectations maybe just the way you define Failure makes you a failure if it does not turn out exactly as you wanted even though the main goal was achieved ? Maybe you have already improperly defined your self as a failure so you can only fail because that’s who you believe you are, or maybe someone in your family always talked down to you and never could live up to their expectations.

 Maybe you failed at something in the past and it had a big impact on and it was so dramatic that we don’t ever want to experience that again so we are afraid of failing, afraid of trying ?

Over all this will prevent you from being the best version of your self having your best life, it can cause low self esteem, the feelings of shame or guilt embarrassment, unworthiness.
Prevents you from being motivated which is a car that just sits in the driveway…never any reason to go which cant be healthy for the car and certainly is not healthy for you.
Maybe even worse what if you engage in self sabotage or create your own hurdles to protect your ego. For me I setup not being able to do certain projects I needed to do unless I had a particular person that had to be there or I would fail, kinda like a co-dependence thing. Perhaps your trying to lose weight but keep going into the pantry knowing you can blame it on the snacks your room mate or loved ones bought..  Maybe you have a test but instead of studying you decided to go to a party, then if you don’t get a good grade its not your fault, you didn’t study so your intelligence is not challenged your egos not hurt, it was the party o and we can blame your friends… no failure here.

What ever your fear of failure is, your Aticaphobia I invent you to sit in in a pull it apart, get familiar with it. Get coaching for it if you need, redefine it in a way that’s real. If your so sure you will fail out it have a plan for if you fail instead of failing as your plan. If plan A does not work the way you set up, whats plan B, if plan B does not work whats plan c ?

What if you have worked through a lot of this already and you still fill like its holding you back? What if you don’t have a fear of Failure, What if it’s a fear of success just like me ?

A lot of things about the Fear of success feel a lot like the fear of failure…

Sometimes we have some great idea, we are not failing, we just stop, we give up, lack of interest… what’s behind that ?
Are we still creating our own hurdles, saying things like it just wasn’t in the cards for me ? Or maybe don’t give up just…. Procrastinate on something for years…

What if you have a fear of success and not a fear of failing. It wasn’t until I became very vulnerable put my self out there got In Touch with my emotions, and got honest with my self that I was able to see my real fear was success.  What would I have to give up and sacrifice to be the person I wanted to be ? What prices am I willing to pay for what I want to become ? If I am in the spot light how will that feel and what will that uncover about me ? Will I be able to handle the pressure if I continue ? Will I ever get to be reckless or have fun again ? Will there be me time ? Will I be able to handle others saying I should quit its not a good idea, Im not enough ? Will I lose friends because im to busy? Will this stress me out all the time ? Am I pretending to be someone im not ? Will people hate me for being successful ?

Understand that fear anxiety feel similar  to excitement in the body. You may be more excited then you are fearful.
It may be uncomfortable being this big person or success that you are not used to. Practice getting uncomfortable, lay down on the floor in a star bucks, stretch this power, the muscle.
If you hear your self thinking or saying negative things about your self, investigate it, play with it a little bit and find out where it comes from even if its all the way from you childhood.

Learn to relax and stay frosty, Journal, practice mindfulness, breath and know you are enough, you are worthy, you worked for this, you deserve this!